never pretty enough.

I follow several inspirational photographers on Tumblr, Twitter, Flickr, Blogger, Facebook, and so on and most of them are amazing self-portrait artists. I've always tried my hand at doing self-portraits, but I've never felt pretty enough to do them. The inspiration only comes when I'm alone and when I feel the most down. Then I try and most often I end up frustrated because I only believe that I'm proving myself correct. I take pictures. I see all of my flaws and never pay attention to the things that might be beautiful. So, today... some of this changed... maybe.

I've had a very stressful year this year. From death to life to lost to loved to hated to shattered; all of it. It's all going to be okay, though. At least that's what I have to constantly tell myself. If I don't then I'm not going to make it through. So what to do when I'm alone and feeling completely shattered?



And though I just typed this, the horrible feelings come back the second I look at my phone. They try and bring me down, and honestly they're succeeding. They've won. I've lost, and they have won.

I thought that maybe, just maybe she would be on my side, but she's not. They're not. Anyways, now that I'm feeling awful again, I'm going to go ahead and post the pictures I took. The ones that I felt at least okay in. Now I'm doubting them.

So I have to do it before I don't.
That's all I've got to say.